Mandy Davis - Diva of Deception

Mandy Davis - Diva of Deception - is a professional close up magician working for banquets, dinners, receptions, weddings, bar/batmitzvahs, private parties etc. A member of The Inner Magic Circle, she serves on their ruling Council and currently holds several posts. . Mandy is also a member of Equity and twice honoured with the Society of American Magicians' Presidential Citation.

Saturday, October 16, 2010

ABOUT TIME TOO! UPDATE....

Yes I know! I've not blogged for over a year... it's inexcusable!

But I just happened to glance at my blogs and honed in on one from June 2006. It made me cry...

Back then I talked about my mum and the deterioration from the fun loving, forgetful, somewhat confused individual who, for the most part, enjoyed the community living and activities at the Nightingale home and was usually glad to see me when I arrived....

Now the story is far from cheerful, a bleak and probably all-too-familiar one to those who have gone through this gloomy tunnel from the beginning to the end.

Mum was moved from Ronson Floor in 2007. She was placed on Lady Woolfson - one of two secure units for dementia sufferers. She was there till this year. I would like to say the changes happened slowly but that wouldn't be quite true.

Mum's ability to talk any sense at all diminished quite rapidly. Soon she was reduced to a kind of 'rap' now and again which centered around the words 'bibbity bobbity boo' and spoken rhythmically and with some pace. After an outburst of this kind, it seemed to take her by surprise and she would collapse into giggles - yes she still giggled like a small child.

Her walking continued, all over the wing as she was now not allowed off her floor as she had been able to do previously. Then, one day in May last year I got a call to say she had collided with a carer and fallen. She was sent off to hospital to check that her bones weren't broken. She had survived unscathed but they discovered a Urinary Tract Infection and kept her bedbound on a ward for a week. She returned unable to stand up from a chair without help and her days of running around the corridors were over.

And so it was... I visited - probably not so often now - at suppertime so I could feed her and in this way have some interaction with her. Otherwise I would be sitting next to her on a chair, bereft of conversation, maybe talking to her about people she had long long forgotten - even her son and grandchildren unknown to her as, indeed, was I.

Almost a year to that day in May I got another call. This time they found that her arm was broken and had, once again, packed her off to hospital. I won't go into details but the fracture was a spiral one and she was kept there for three weeks without being taken from her bed.

She returned to the Nightingale but, this time, to a different floor. Samson is bright and new, a lovely place to be with carpeted bedrooms, as opposed to linoleum, and caring, dedicated staff. There is now no capability of sitting up unaided so she lies in a bed-chair all day. However staff who had dealings with her during the past year tell me she is more relaxed and happy now - and I do feel that this is true. There are more smiles and less grumpiness overall considering grumpy is the usual state of play these days.

And so she sits - or, rather, so she lies.... day after day... unable to deal with anything for herself, not even think....


Is this a life? Yesterday I had a call to say that a friend's mother had died in her sleep at the age of 79. Am I selfish to wish that it was me in that position? That my mum would leave us now, in her sleep, freed from the prison of her demented body and mind. I feel guilt at thinking that but deep inside I know that it would be for the very best... she has done no harm, let her go in peace - and sooner rather than later for all our sakes.